Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Job Seekers

I am sent hundreds of resumes each week and constantly complain to friends about how terrible they are, so yesterday a friend asked me for resume writing tips and if I knew of any services that help write resumes. I told her she doesn't need a service, just download some free resume templates she can find online, but then I shared with her the things I see FREQUENTLY in resumes that are instant deal breakers that won't get job seekers a call for an interview:

My pet peeves when looking at resumes:

-Teeny tiny hard to read font. (If I'm going to get squint wrinkles from size 6 font, I don't need you in my life. Think things through, the person sifting through resumes is getting hundreds of them--make it easy to glance.) For comparison, you're reading size 10 font right now.

-Fancy script/scroll font that's hard to read on the screen. (This isn't your wedding invitation.)

-Misspelled words, incorrect words, and text type. (for real u see peaple right resumes like this)

-Only putting years on positions instead of months and years. (2011-2012 might mean you were there Dec 2011-Jan 2012,  I don't know.)

-Leaving off dates altogether. (What are you hiding? Have you not worked in 20 years? Do you leave jobs every 3 months?)

-Not putting job title on each company listing. (What the heck did you do there? Were you the receptionist or the VP of Sales?)

-Weird email addresses (crazybeotch2000 is just a warning to me. Emails are free, create one for job seeking that is just your name or initials.)

-Resumes saved with weird names: ie: cindysmommysresume (I actually was sent this for a professional corporate office position.)

-Resumes not in chronological order. (WHY are people doing this????)

-Resumes created with zero effort: ie: a plain word document with a listing of jobs, everything on the page in the same size boring font, no bold type to separate, no style to the name/heading, no bullet points. (If you're so lazy you can't put any effort into your resume, you'll probably be lazier once you have a paycheck.)

-No contact information (I download resumes in batches, you're not special enough for me to keep your email, so you better have it on your actual resume if you want an interview.)

-No home city listed (Do you live 2 hours from the location, or 20 minutes? Are you applying from Indiana for a job in Chicago? Do you live in Ohio and are applying for a job in Michigan? WHAT city/state do you live in?!??)

-No job description under the listed position. (What the heck did you do at your job??)

-Somewhere in the job description not listing what kind of company the candidate was working for. (I don't want to google "Snow Company" to find out if that was a clothing company or not--it should say somewhere in the job description.)

-Resumes submitted that don't have the experience that is listed in the job ad. Don't apply if you don't have the experience, you're not going to get a call. (I'm thrilled you sold computers, or you're a chef, or dance instructor, or you worked in the automotive industry, but the job ad says you must have 2 years of medical sales, so stop wasting my time.)

-Resumes over 2 pages---most people can still get everything on one page (I do using a column format), but if you're going over 2 pages into 3 or 4 you better be a CEO of a multi-billion dollar company, not a retail sales associate or a newbie just out of college. I don't need to see what you were doing 10 years ago. 

-Irrelevant information: I don't care what a candidate's hobbies or volunteer activities are, that they cook for the church bake sale, or that they're a mommy. This has nothing to do with getting a job.

-Including a photo. (Get over yourself) Whoever told Gen Y that photos of themselves either alone, with a boyfriend, or making a duckface is appropriate for a resume and job seeking needs to retract this immediately. I see if way too often and it's not appropriate. 

Whenever I complain about any of these things to my HR friends, they see this all the time too and can usually top my tales (links to personal websites showing candidates with their dogs and babies, showing up to interviews with a dog or baby....).. Sorry high school and colleges, but if you're not sending graduates out with basic resume writing and interview skills, you're failing your people.....